Stephen Armstrong: Trump piqued by offer from space alien Realtor

Published: 9/11/2019 8:00:14 PM

Washington, D.C. — On Aug. 28, 2019, NASA has reported a communication from a space alien real estate agent, offering Donald Trump a part of S190814, a neutron star colliding with a black hole.

“It will generate tons and tons of palladium, gold and other rare earths,” the agent said. “You’ll love it, even though the view from inside S190814 is a bit dark.”

The president said he was interested in inspecting the property. The agent said that it will really sparkle in the sky pretty soon.

Surprisingly, Democratic House Speaker Nancy Pelosi said Trump’s planned visit was a good idea.

“Look,” she said, “he can’t do math, and to him 130,000,000 light years is just like $130,000,000. He can lose that in the blink of an eye.”

“We’re ready,” the NASA spokesperson said. “The space capsule is on top of the rocket,” and added that they needed only a couple of minutes to load an endlessly repeating reel of Mantovani and Yanni onto the sound system.

“We think it will help him relax,” according to NASA.

Stephen Armstrong, Ph.D.


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