One morning, a number of years ago, I found myself standing in line at a Starbucks counter.

The woman in front of me was screaming into her phone, arguing about what seemed to be a rent dispute. Obviously irate, she was completely unaware of her impact on those of us in her vicinity. When her turn came to order, she snarled at the barista: “grande soy latte,” making no eye contact, continuing with her obnoxious phone conversation.

I felt compelled to act. I approached the woman and said, sternly: “Come on, you’re being rude to everyone, especially to the worker behind the counter. Can you talk somewhere else?” She gave me the evil eye, grabbed her hot drink and left.

When I stepped up to order, the barista said: “We wish we could say that to so many customers, you wouldn’t believe it! Thank you. You’re our hero. Your drinks are free whenever you come in here.” And for the next couple of months, she and her coworkers served me whatever I wanted; they wouldn’t even take tips.

As I look back on the incident, I question whether I was right in confronting this person. After all, I didn’t know her or the circumstances of her life. Perhaps she was in distress, facing obstacles hard to overcome, dealing with problems much greater than any I had ever known. Who was I to judge her? Did I have the right to get upset and interfere?

My parents (mainly my mom) encouraged me to express opinions. More importantly, she raised me to believe that I knew better than others, that the way I viewed the world was the correct way to view the world. (I could be exaggerating, but I believe this was the basic message I received.)

My wife of 44 years, on the other hand, was raised to keep her thoughts to herself. It was fine to have opinions, but one never, absolutely never used them to overtly judge, criticize, or even confront others. She wasn’t thrilled about my being deemed a hero at our local coffee spot.

Viewing with fear and dismay the current state of the world, I once again come up against the pros and cons of expressing opinions. Mind you, I have many opinions, some of them quite strong and, probably, unchangeable. But these days, personal perspectives are perceived by many as hostile gestures, as proclamations of being aligned with one faction and, by definition, being against all others.

Expressions of support for a cause or nation or group of people too often evoke emotions ranging from insulting and repulsive to hateful and violent. The 1-10 rating scale has been reduced to two numbers: you are either a 1 or a 10.

When it comes to understanding one another, intolerance seems to have replaced thoughtful listening. State an opinion about abortion, immigration, gender fluidity, gay marriage, or social welfare programs and risk inspiring the wrath and condemnation of those who disagree.

Sadly, I now wonder whether it is worth stating opinions in public at all. What do we hope to accomplish by doing so? I suppose some of us want to show support and respect for certain causes, people or beliefs, but in doing so, we almost certainly infuriate others and widen the gap of compassion that exists in our country and across the globe.

Recently, for example, during the celebration of Hanukkah, lighted menorahs were displayed in some windows throughout the Valley. It’s a lovely tradition, as is the display of Christmas candles and lights. But this year, the menorahs sparked discussions on social media. I read several comments expressing the importance of “being brave” and showing support for Israel and the tragedies its people suffered at the hands of Hamas terrorists.

I am Jewish; several of my beloved cousins live in Israel. I am enraged by the senseless slaughter of over 1,200 Israeli Jews. But I am also enraged by Israel’s response: senseless destruction and the killing of far greater than 1,200 innocent Palestinians.

In this context, what is the meaning behind the displaying of menorahs? An innocent nod to a joyous holiday? A simple statement of religious pride? A gesture of support to the local Jewish community? Solidarity with Israel and its government’s policies? A message to the world that Israel will not back down?

I don’t know. I just don’t know. I am completely torn about this and many other expressions of opinions most of us offer from time to time. I end up thinking of John Lennon and how he might have dealt with this issue. In his masterpiece, “Imagine,” would he have added “No opinions” to his list of “No religion,” “No countries, ”No Heaven,” and “No possessions”?

Can we imagine a world where opinions are replaced by civil dialogue, where every one of us, in every situation, is listened to in a respectful, non-judgmental manner?

Unlike Lennon, I am not a dreamer. I tend to lean toward the dark side (which is probably why I find outlets writing humorous guest columns, this one an exception). I guess all I can do is try a little harder to withhold judgment, to see the best in people, and to remind myself (sorry, Mom) that I am not always right.

Gene Stamell lives in Leverett. He can be reached at gstamell@gmail.com.