Parents decry possible return of Amherst school counselor fired over anti-trans actions

AMHERST — Parents, students and community members are calling on administrators for the Amherst-Pelham Regional Schools and the Regional School Committee to ensure that a middle school counselor, fired in 2023 following alleged anti-trans actions that included repeatedly misgendering students and promoting her religious beliefs, have no contact with children if and when she is reinstated to her role.

With an arbitrator deciding that Delinda Dykes is entitled to return to her position due to procedural errors by the district, parent Laura Jane Hunter was among those in a packed high school library Tuesday explaining that transphobia, homophobia and religiosity don’t belong in a public school and that Dykes’ presence would be retraumatizing for her family and other families.

“I don’t want Miss (Delinda) Dykes near my children ever, and I don’t think she should ever be allowed to be near any students,” said Hunter, the parent of two children. “She should not be in any student-facing position.”

For Sylvan Cocco-Romano, a rising junior, having Dykes back as a middle school counselor would cause a lack of love and respect for students there, who won’t be able to be their true selves.

“I feel worried and I’m scared for people who are going to be in middle school in the fall,” Cocco-Romano said.

The meeting came following the recent announcement by Superintendent E. Xiomara Herman that an arbitrator ruled against the district after Dykes filed an appeal to get her job back.

While not responding directly on Tuesday to what will happen with Dykes, should she return, Herman said she has spent time reflecting on the decision and the broader patterns, wanting to ensure that systems are in place to lead with love, transparency and a relentless focus on student well being.

“We cannot meet that commitment if our systems are unclear, unenforced or inconsistent,” Herman said at the school committee meeting. “The arbitration decision highlighted longstanding gaps in how we document, communicate and enforce expectations related to personnel.”

In an email Wednesday, a spokesperson for Herman’s office said she would be issuing separate statements on whether Dykes will, in fact, be reinstated to a position at the middle school, and how much the district will need to pay Dykes, given that the arbiter agreed to back pay since her firing.

Since starting her tenure July 1, 2024, Herman said she has supported a learning environment where all children can be comfortable, safe and be their true and authentic selves.

“We are changing to become the kind of district every child deserves,” Herman said. “We cannot ever arrive at this same place again. We owe it to our children and to the future of this district to end this now.”

The hard, necessary work includes rebuilding systems that are clear, fair and enforceable and where supervision, performance management and accountability is no longer informal or inconsistently applied.

Parents voice concerns

Numerous others outlined their concerns to school leaders.

Another parent, Jill Brevik, said bringing back an employee who committed acts of violence and gender-identity bullying is troubling.

“My family is devastated by the decision to reinstate Delinda Dykes as a counselor,” Brevik said.

Brevik recounted getting out her transgender flag to bring to a rally preceding the meeting, where support and love would be shown her trans child, and an appreciation for they/them pronouns.

“Their connection to their pronouns is more than just language,” Brevik said. “The word ‘they’ is a lot to them.”

“Reinstating this person in this district sends the absolute opposite message to my child,” Brevik said. “The School Committee has an obligation to every child, including trans children like my own, to know they are safe, valued and supported by the adults at the school.”

Another parent, Kara Knott, described how her son was relentlessly bullied and harassed with anti-trans behavior, threats and taunts that put him in harm’s way, and the incidents went unreported, with misgendering continuing and excuses being made for years “It was devastating for him,” and nearly cost him his life, Knott said.

“My child is thriving today,” Knott said. “I am really lucky he survived middle school.”

“I am begging the School Committee, the leadership here in the district, to not only demand that appropriate policies and practices are created to protect all children, including my child and children like him, but that they are implemented with fidelity, that they are consistent across all schools in our district and that there is transparency and accountability,” Knott said.

Andrew Wendkith, a transgender person and parent of three children, asked school officials to be on the right side of history.

“I plead that the district make it very clear to all employees that they are expected to follow all aspects of the Fair Educational Practices Act, even if they personally do not agree with them,” Wendkith said. “I further ask that you not allow intimidation tactics from an increasingly emboldened far right to cloud your judgment or stop you from protecting transgender youth now or in the future.”

Strengthening practices and policies

The public comments to the School Committee came before a presentation by Human Resources Director Jennifer Ortiz, who outlined how strengthening accountability practices through documentation and leadership action should ensure that the district won’t face a similar situation going forward.

Ortiz said the district wasn’t able to take necessary action since documentation was lacking and there were inconsistencies across building leadership, some caused by what she called “fundamental discomfort” in having difficult conversations and handling personnel actions as needed.

One update is enhanced progressive discipline procedures, which the arbitrator cited as not occurring before Dykes was fired.

Ortiz said she is working with the School Committee’s Joint Policy Subcommittee on ways to keep students and staff safe in environments, and making sure policies are in place to deal with situations when expectations aren’t met and policies are violated.

“District leadership needs to do better, we need to own where the gaps are and where the systemic failures are, and we need to do the uncomfortable work,” Ortiz said.

But Amherst representative Irv Rhodes, who was on the School Committee two years ago, said he is angry because he trusted that similar policies and protocols were in place two years ago. When he took his concerns to then Superintendent Michael Morris, Rhodes said he was assured that rumors about religious meetings being held before school were inaccurate.

Rhodes said he didn’t go far enough to wonder why he kept hearing “all this stuff” was happening and sat back and believed, even as children were being hurt. Now, he said he wants clear, consistent communication from the administration, and for the leaders to understand their jobs are on the line.

“Because I am not going to be stepped on again like that, I’m not going to be surprised, I’m not going to hear that kids have been hurt, and I was not doing anything because I believed, and belief is just not enough,” Rhodes said. “I’m not going to be in a position where I am lied to again. I am not going to turn a deaf ear to that which I hear.”

Amherst representative Bridget Hynes, too, said she worries about “cognitive dissonance” by focusing on better policies, and would rather explore all options for civil disobedience against the arbitrator’s decision.

Still, Hynes said she is comfortable in the work already done by the district, such as the Welcoming Communities training for all educators to show love and affirmation for all children, and the improved bullying reporting system known as BRIM.

Pre-meeting rally

A half-hour rally in support of trans children, organized by the ad-hoc LGBTQIA+ Caucus, preceded the School Committee meeting, with some School Committee members present, as well as Herman, alongside members of the Rainbow Umbrella Crew, or Parasol Patrol.

Surrounding the library entrance to the school, the gathering was to show trans students that they are not alone and won’t be allowed to be harmed. A number of families were present, with some children holding trans flags and signs reading “Trans Kids Deserve Respect, Too” and “Protect LGBTQI+ students.”

Ali Wicks-Lim, an organizer, said she is exhausted from two years of dealing with this.

“I’m tired of watching the kids suffer the consequences of adult failure,” Wicks-Lim said, though also acknowledging that most of the School Committee and leadership in the district is changed, yet they are the only ones who have the power to fix problems. Wicks-Lim also thanked Herman for briefly participating.

Wicks-Lim recounted the deadnaming of students and prayer circles, which led attendees to “boo.” “That is the only response to that,” Wicks-Lim said.

There also were chants of “trans lives are what we’re here for,” “queer lives are what we’re here for” and “Amherst is no place for hate.”’

Organizers disseminated form letters that can be sent to the central office that Dykes have no contact with children, and there also were advocates encouraging students to understand their rights.

Those who took the microphone for the rally had some of the same messages brought to the meeting.

“She should not be put in a school where she is working with students, she should not be near students,” said parent Amber Cano-Mation,

School Committee member William Sherr of Pelham, who joined the panel in 2023, related his personal story as a queer youth.

“I know what it’s like to grow up feeling different,” said Sherr, wearing a T-shirt explaining the importance of using correct pronouns.

Sherr said that suicide risks for trans youth drop when using correct pronouns and names and that officials need to recognize, through policies and practices, that misgendering is harassment and can be an act that has deadly consequences.

Scott Merzbach can be reached at smerzbach@gazettenet.com.