Postpartum surprises: Five women tell how they dealt with them

By Dave Eisenstadter

For the Gazette

Published: 05-15-2017 7:40 PM

Each week on Thursday afternoons the Beyond Birth group meets in the little yellow house by Cooley Dickinson Hospital on Locust Street in Northampton. While my wife and I were on leave from our jobs following the birth of our son, we tried to attend as often as we could.

The group welcomes parents of babies up to six months to share the triumphs and challenges of those exciting and very difficult first months of parenting.

Among the biggest surprises — both for my wife and me — was how little we all know about the postpartum period. I had heard about postpartum depression, but had scarcely heard a thing about the hormone fluctuations, clogged milk ducts, breastfeeding latch challenges, effects of sleep deprivation and many other health challenges that were coming up again and again.

According to a recent study published with the National Institutes of Health in Maryland, few national statistics exist on postpartum health-care utilization or postpartum health problems encountered by new mothers. By contrast, the same study said a high number of new mothers — about 84 percent — receive prenatal care starting in their first trimester.

Ann Buscemi, the educator and mother of three (her children are now 42, 37 and 27) who leads the weekly group, told me the majority of what comes up at these meetings consists of what she calls “on-the-job training.”

Buscemi, who also teaches birthing classes at Cooley-Dickinson Hospital, said most expecting parents can’t begin to fathom what parenthood will be like.

“They can’t even hear about newborn care and breastfeeding because they are still trying to figure out how the baby gets out,” she said.

During the group, Buscemi strives to create an atmosphere of non-judgment, a space to bring up any issue that goes along with parenting.

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“There is no wrong, no right, no perfect,” she said. “It is learning to be comfortable.”

Following are some women from the group who agreed to talk about the surprises they encountered postpartum and how they dealt with them.

Breastfeeding 101

Emmie Hukowicz, 34, of Hadley, had a long labor and eventually had to have a cesarean section.

“So, that sucked, but afterwards the struggle was breastfeeding,” she said.

Hukowicz’s baby, Justin, was nine pounds, eight ounces when he was born and dropped by more than a pound at his first weigh-in a few days later. Hukowicz was concerned because Justin wasn’t able to get a good latch on her breast.

Justin had a tongue-tie, a common affliction in which the strip of skin connecting the tongue to the bottom of the mouth is shorter than usual. This makes it difficult for the baby to get hold of the mother’s nipple and more painful for the mother when the baby does.

Hukowicz had the tongue-tie clipped by an ear, nose and throat specialist at Baystate Medical Center in Springfield. Then she saw lactation specialist Kate Bohne, who runs free groups in the Valley.

Bohne encouraged Hukowicz to change the way she was holding Justin as she fed him, and gave her confidence that she was doing a good job. Even so, it took Hukowicz about six weeks to get where she felt comfortable.

“I never thought there was going to be pain involved,” she said, “and all of a sudden there were days I would sit and he would be latched and I would be crying because it hurt so bad.”

It was through Bohne’s group that Hukowicz learned about the Beyond Birth group with Buscemi. The lactation support was helpful, she says, but the camaraderie of both groups was invaluable to her for her mental health.

Her husband had gotten just a short time off work following Justin’s birth. Going to the groups got her out of the house and gave her the chance to meet others who could relate to what she was feeling.

“As excited as I was to have him, it is isolating to have him,” she said of her son.

That was not what she had expected.

“I scoffed while I was pregnant about going to groups and becoming involved in the mothering community,” she said. “I definitely said that’s not me and I’m going to be fine on my own.”

Creating a community around parenting that she can spend time with, text message or see on Facebook has helped her feel supported, she said.

No, this is not normal

Jacqueline Tuttle, 30, lives in Sunderland. She had read about labor and was sure she would be able to face it without fear. She didn’t anticipate having what is called back labor, when the baby is head down as it should be, but facing toward the mother’s abdomen instead of toward the back.

Labor in this position is painful because the hard part of the baby’s skull lines up with the hard part of the woman’s tailbone.

After her daughter, Rinoa, was born, postpartum originally seemed like no big deal. Rinoa was able to feed easily and Tuttle felt her own body was recovering. When she arrived home, she found her mother had stocked the fridge. “Thank goodness,” she said.

But she was still bleeding. She had a blood clot in her uterus that had to be passed.

Once it was identified, doctors gave her a pill to make her uterus contract. Tuttle was frightened that it was going to be extremely painful, but she slept through most of the process. Tuttle hadn’t realize at first that the bleeding was trouble, thinking it was a normal part of recovery. She said being able to call her health care provider at any hour was crucial.

“I think if I would have been in a different area maybe or had a different health care provider that didn’t have a way to call at any time, I would have been a lot sicker than I was,” she said. “I was losing a ton of blood.”

Tuttle believes that in the United States medical support for the postpartum period is insufficient.

“In this country we just do a six-week checkup and then that’s it,” she said. “It leaves something to be desired; it is not enough.”

She also thinks there should be more information about the health of the pelvic floor, the muscles and ligaments that support the uterus and other organs in the pelvic area.

Pelvic floor physical therapy is sometimes not covered by insurance, she said.

One strength of living here is the number of support groups in the area, Tuttle said. She said she has been to free group sessions with lactation consultants and values time spent at the Beyond Birth parenting group.

Hiring a doula — a nonmedical professional who assists a person before, during, or after childbirth — was a good decision, too, she said. The doula not only answered health questions but was able to connect her with organizations and businesses focused on new parents in the Valley.

Second time’s the charm

Courtney Campbell of Amherst spent the nine months of her first pregnancy reading up on birth. When her baby, Zola, was born in June 2015, Campbell felt completely unprepared for caring for her child.

During her second pregnancy, she decided to spend her energy preparing herself for the new baby.

Wilder was born in January and Campbell, 29, spent a full 40 days on her recovery.

“The 40 days happens in a lot of different cultures,” she said. “In India it is really prevalent and in Chinese culture there’s a Chinese postpartum time, about a 40-day period, called confinement that involves completely resting.”

She ate a diet of high nutrient foods, including bone broths and infusions and built a network of people to help her so she could concentrate on caring for the baby.

One aspect that felt out of control after her first child was born was the number of visitors she received. About 30 people visited her in the first week. As a result, bonding with her baby became difficult, and breastfeeding did not come easy to her.

This time, she focused on getting her own needs across.

“I’ve never had to ask for help before in a big way, so this time around I really practiced asking,” she said. “Knowing how to ask for help and talking to family or friends about ways they could help me so I didn’t have to tell them what I needed in the moment was important. When you’re having a hard time, you can’t always articulate what you need.”

Postpartum anxiety

Most people have heard of postpartum depression, but less commonly known is postpartum anxiety.

Magda Oiry, 38, had her first child, Marie, in February 2010. She was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism and had a bad case of postpartum anxiety disorder.

“It was an acute version of being a mother; everything was worrisome,” she said.

Oiry had at least one panic attack watching a movie in which a small child died at the hands of brutal Nazis.

“I couldn’t watch TV or anything violent,” she said.

Oiry had physical pain from her C-section birth, but her mental health dominated her postpartum life, she said.

Oiry now lives in Northampton, but grew up in France. She said while France has excellent coverage for the physical side of postpartum recovery, her home country lags the United States in providing community support for new mothers.

“French people do get a real maternity leave but in terms of groups for support it is another story,” she said. “That is a good thing about the States. A lot of people are getting together. It is life changing.”

With her second baby, Zeke, who was born in July 2016, she was sure to get out a lot more and join support groups.

That support not only helps with anxiety and isolation, it helps with body image, too, she said. Oiry, like a lot of women, did not lose much of her pregnancy weight. Talking with other women who have been through pregnancy helps improve body image, she said.

It takes a village

Heidi Baj, 29, of Hadley had her daughter, Celestine, in December. For her the postpartum period has been a lot easier than it could have been because of people helping her out.

“I joke with my husband that I write more thank you cards than I change diapers,” she said.

Celestine was born nearly three weeks early, and Baj said she has felt blessed to have family and in-laws to help take care of her and her family.

“It has made a huge difference in the way I was able to cope,” she said.

Baj’s mother-in-law and father-in-law came during the day and encouraged Baj to nap during the early morning hours, waking her only if Celestine needed to be fed.

“I have friends and their parents or in-laws live far away and it breaks my heart,” she said. “I could not survive without my family’s support.”

The main challenge for Baj has been the lack of sleep. Whereas before she was loathe to go without a full eight hours, the best she has been able to get of late is five or six, which took a long time to get used to.

As far as advice, Baj said she would tell women to take it slow after birth, not rushing milestones for themselves or for their babies.

“My mother told me something that was great. She said, ‘you can do everything you did before, but it may take time.’”

Dave Eisenstadter can be reached at deisen@valleyadvocate.com

.Resources

Below is a list of resources women in the article found helpful. This is not a complete list. There are many more resources in the Valley.

•Acupuncture: Kate Cadwgan, Radiant Point Acupuncture, http://radiantpointacupuncture.com

•Beyond Birth group: Thursday 1 to 3 p.m., Midwifery Center, Cooley Dickinson, Locust Street, Northampton, free

•Breastfeeding support: Kate Bohne and others, http://www.valleybreastfeeding.org/home/breastfeeding-help.html, many are free

•Doula: Warm Welcome Birth, Michelle L’Esperance, http://www.warmwelcomebirth.com

•Herbal and nourishment support: Kristen Avonti, soulmidwifery.org

•Home cleaning: Green Love Eco-Cleaning with a discount for new moms, http://www.greenloveclean.com/postpartum-discount-program.html

•Massage Therapy and Tibetan Medicine: Mira Weil, http://www.miraweil.com

•Baby-friendly movies: Tuesday afternoons, Amherst Cinema, $8.50

•Pelvic floor physical therapy: Patricia Young, http://www.restorewell.com

•Sleep coaching: Beth Grams Haxby, http://sleepandparenting.com

•Yoga with baby: Tuesday 10:45 a.m., Yoga Center Amherst, Kellogg Avenue, Amherst, $16

•Hike-it baby: hikes around the Pioneer Valley www.hikeitbaby.com

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