Bruce Watson: Your Campaign-English Dictionary

Several campaigns have come and gone since I published my Campaign-English Dictionary. Here's a sample:

Third party, n. a political party that runs a politician who isn't a politician favoring policies that aren't policies to please voters who don't vote.

Finding the feng in each shui

Like many Westerners, the first time I heard the words feng shui, I couldn't help thinking "Make that with a side of egg rolls." But now that I've mastered the ancient Chinese art, I'm ashamed of my ignorance. And my house.